December 2023
December 2023
December 2023
The holidays have a well-earned reputation for being a time that’s all about giving and gaiety. On top of giving gifts and giving our time and energy to plan and attend events. It can also feel like we’re obliged to exude happy, carefree energy – even if that’s not how we actually feel.
The holidays typically are a time when we go out of our way to connect with family and friends and nurture relationships and holiday visits. How can we create a meaningful holiday connection, when most of the year has been so isolating—especially for older adults?
Social connection can help boost your mood and manage your emotions. We’ve thrived as a species by connection to others. Whether we were hunting for meat, gathering berries, or traveling in stagecoaches – we did it together in social groups.
It’s this human connection that has advanced our world from gathering and hunting for our food to shopping for it in grocery stores.
But with the rise of digital interactions, we’ve also seen an increase in loneliness. Social gatherings are now done virtually. We celebrate the events in our lives with a heart or thumbs-up emoji. Human connection is the sense of looseness and belongingness a person can experience when having supportive relationships with those around them.
Human connection can be a chat over coffee with a friend, a hug from a partner after a long day, or a hike in the woods with a family member. Connecting with someone doesn’t have to always include words, either. Time spent in relative closeness and experience can also be a bonding experience. Loneliness has been shown to impact not only our physical health but our emotional health, too.
Tips for connecting with others:
If you’re not sure where to start, try some of these tips.
During particularly stressful stretches of time. It’s important to commit to taking care of ourselves and our minds. After all, how can we truly show up for others when we’re exhausted, on edge, or overwhelmed? By doing small, thoughtful acts, we can maintain a sense of calm and balance, no matter how hectic the festivities might get. When we practice self-care during the holidays, it can be surprising how quickly we can begin to experience the benefits.
The Importance of Self-Care
When there is a lot going on in our lives, we tend to deprioritize taking time to care for ourselves. “It can feel as though there’s just no more space in our mind,’ says Headspace co-founder and former Buddhist monk, Andy Puddicombe. “It’s really tempting to let go of the things that are most important to us and the things that are most important to us and the things that are going to keep us healthy and well. But now more than ever, it’s really important that we focus on those things.
While certain self-care rituals are labeled as a luxury, the International Self-Care Foundation defines this concept as anything people do for themselves to establish and maintain health, and to prevent and deal with illness. This may include personal hygiene, nutrition, lifestyle, environmental factors (living conditions, social habits, etc.), and socio-economic factors (income level, cultural beliefs, etc.).
We can make these aspects of our self-care more conscious, more mindful by bringing our attention to the chore or task at hand, without distraction, without being preoccupied in our heads. This is mindfulness – the ability to be more present throughout the day, and the more we practice this life skill the more we are looking after our mind, and more self-care we are applying with little extra effort.
Self-care may also look like filling our schedules with activities that benefit our physical or mental health: Practicing meditation, taking a daily walk, or reading a book have been linked to reduced levels of stress and anxiety, improvements in mood, immune function, and focus, and increased productivity, to name a few benefits.
But let’s remember, self-care isn’t one-size-all. Any at that offers the relaxation, stimulation, or joy that one seeks is valid. And that includes saying “no” to invites or requests, or spending time alone to rest and do nothing.
Self-Care Tips for the Holidays
Throughout the season, we might try using one or all of these tips to practice self-care during the holidays:
1. Find short periods of time to sit quietly.
Sometimes self-care can be as simple as taking a few minutes to stop, sit and breathe. Whether we’re able to find a free 3 minutes or 30 minutes to take a break, it can make a world of difference for our well-being.
2. Tap into a sense of play.
Throughout the holidays, it can be easy to get wrapped up in all the logistics the season requires, constantly ticking things off to-do lists. Before we know it, the holidays have become less of a celebration and more of a long chore.
Maybe that means watching nostalgic Christmas movies or reveling in the daily surprise of an advent calendar. Whatever it is, make these elements a priority can help bring balance to the stressful seasons.
3. Care for the body.
While caring for the mind is a great start to self-care, caring for the body is an equally important part of the equation. During the holidays, preserving our physical health may look like having healthy sleep hygiene or practicing mindful eating to better navigate all the indulging associated with the season. It can also look like taking time to schedule a daily walk, a habit that studies show can help reduce anxiety, depression, social withdrawal, and a negative mood, while also boosting self-esteem.
4. Make room for all types of feelings.
There tends to be an underlying pressure during the holidays to feel perpetually happy and festive. While some people may feel truly blissful during this time, 64% of people say they experience a case of the holiday blues at some point throughout the season. It’s common for this time of year to bring up feelings of sadness, stress, anxiety, grief and loneliness.
Should these emotions arise, we might sit with them as an act of self-care. While this can admittedly be uncomfortable, we can use meditation to navigate these feelings in a way that may help us feel much better in the end.
Meditation offers us a chance to step away from the thinking mind and instead focus on the breath, rather than our thoughts and emotions. This anchors us to the present moment and calms the mind.
5. Practice letting go of expectations.
Sometimes, the best act of holiday self-care we can give ourselves is simply to work on letting go of the standards and expectations we often set for ourselves at this time of year – fixed ideas created in the mind that might not match how life actually plays out. This is something else we can get to observe when meditating.
6. Spiritual Self-Care.
Attending a religious service, spending time in nature, meditating, incorporating regular acts of kindness into your day, or keeping a gratitude journal.
Caring for yourself is essential and a must to thrive mentally, physically and spiritually. Put yourself at the top of the list for giving and gifting.
I wish all of my friends and associates the happiest of holidays. Remember health is wealth.
Thank you for journeying with me this year through my musings and tips for a healthy and better you.